Other than the holy cup that Jesus drank from at the last supper, a “Holy Grail” is a term often used when referring to something that we want very much, but is very hard to find or achieve. It can seem illusive to us. Of all the things we desire most in our lives, happiness seems to be at the top of the list. So, what does it take for us to be truly happy? I know we can all relate to times in our lives where we experience fleeting happiness…for instance when we find a great deal on the purse we’ve been eyeing or get asked out on a date from a guy we’ve had a crush on, or get a compliment from someone we look up to and admire. However, deep abiding happiness is so much more than that. This type of happiness is in a completely different category. So, what exactly is this happiness and how can we find it?
My Own Journey:
I have to admit that for a great part of my life, I lived according to whatever society and my peers dictated. From the way I dressed and styled my hair to the attitudes and behaviors I adopted. I never stopped long enough to ask myself if these decisions were making me happy. One of those erroneous decisions was to turn away from my natural femininity and take on more masculine characteristics. Doing so never felt comfortable to me. In fact I hated trying to be someone I wasn’t. But I felt pressured so I kept up the charade and moved further away from my true self. I rarely looked deep inside to find out what my heart really wanted. Can you relate?
Then when I set out to write my book, Simply Feminine, I discovered from men that my femininity was something precious and nothing to be ashamed of. It opened my eyes to a truth that had long been suppressed. I felt so happy to learn this news as it resonated in my heart. Awakening to the real value of my femininity for the first time, I was finally set free to be my true self…my feminine self!
When we live by the standards of society and others, without any thought of our own beliefs or values, it causes us to live in cognitive dissonance, which creates confusion, chaos, and stress within. Living in this way is like selling our souls because it whittles away our self respect and robs us of peace of mind, not to mention that these stresses age us prematurely.
Finding True Happiness:
True happiness is an abiding feeling of inner contentment that all is right in our world. The only way we can find this happiness is by being in harmony with our authentic selves. We can only be in harmony with ourselves when we live from our heart’s truth. For me, living my true self is living from my feminine core. I’m not 100% there yet, but I’m growing in that direction. It helps if I ask myself questions like, what’s true for me right now? How am I really feeling about this situation, this person? My feminine intuition helps here. Then I have to really listen to what my heart says. The next step is to act in accordance with what’s true for me.
So, could it be that a key to the happiness that’s alluded many of us women can be found in our authentic femininity? Could it be that this timeless part of us that we’ve dismissed and discarded, is actually our Holy Grail?